When we were little the number of friends we had correlated directly to our happiness. Being popular meant it was imperative to have *everybody* like you. Birthday parties were jam-packed. People would vie to sit next to you at lunch or play with you at recess. You had sixteen ‘BFFs’ on a rotating schedule. And if one pissed you off, made you mad (sorry, this is a family blog says Talia) you were mad for a day but then had another ‘BFF’ waiting in the wings. We used trinkets and bracelets and rings and tokens to mark our territories. We had friends from all walks of life to help us create our empire. Friends from school and friends from camp. Friends from ballet and friends from the neighborhood. Friends of friends and then a few more. As long as we had lots, we were happy.

Whenever I would get in a fight with a friend when I was younger, or cried because my ‘BFF du jour’ told me she wasn’t my friend anymore, my grandma would console me by reminding me that the number of friends we have really doesn’t matter at all. It wasn’t about quantity; it was about quality. I didn’t understand this. It made no sense. After all, she didn’t have a Facebook account.

But then I grew up. And now I get it.

In addition to watching my daughters go through some of the same friendship struggles I endured at a young age, I’ve recently also had the opportunity to evaluate some of my own friendships as an adult. Question relationships of friends with whom I have a history, and reflect on the lasting power of others. I’ve also grown close with new friends with whom I have no history but whom I’ve come to cherish and find we have more in common than the surface shows.

But one thing’s for sure, our time becomes more precious as we age. And making plans with friends we love becomes even more challenging from a logistical standpoint. It takes more effort than ever. Life just gets in the way. But it also means that every now and then, well, we have to trim the fat. Work to improve the quality of the friendships worth keeping and not waste energy on the quantity. So while it’s sad to think of saying goodbye to some, I guess it’s just a part of growing up, no matter how old we are. Gosh, I didn’t mean to be so melancholy…guess it’s just one of those days! Those grandmas…guess they really do know everything.

Best grandma ever.

Here’s to good friends. Whether it’s ten, three or just one.

Grandma’s Banana Bread

*Caution! This one requires measurements!!

Ingredients:

• 4-5 ripe bananas
• 1/2 cup vegetable or canola oil
• 1 cup sugar
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 2 eggs
• 2 cups flour
• 1 tsp. baking soda
• 3 tbsp. milk
• 1/2 tsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp. vanilla

Directions:

1. Grease two loaf pans and preheat oven to 350.
2. Mix oil and sugar.
3. Add eggs and bananas and beat until large lumps disappear (if only we could do this with our cellulite).
4. Add milk and vanilla.
5. Sift rest of ingredients and dump into mixture.
6. Sprinkle with cinnamon and sugar on top (or add some mini chocolate chips for kicks!).
7. Bake for 55-60 minutes or until fork comes out clean.
8. Keep one and give one to your BFF.

Recipe Card

Grandma's Banana Bread

Ingredients

4-5 ripe bananas
1/2 cup vegetable or canola oil
1 cup sugar
1/2 tsp. salt
2 eggs
2 cups flour
1 tsp. baking soda
3 tbsp. milk
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. vanilla

Directions

Grease two loaf pans and preheat oven to 350.
Mix oil and sugar.
Add eggs and bananas and beat until large lumps disappear (if only we could do this with our cellulite).
Add milk and vanilla.
Sift rest of ingredients and dump into mixture.
Sprinkle with cinnamon and sugar on top (or add some mini chocolate chips for kicks!).
Bake for 55-60 minutes or until fork comes out clean.
Keep one and give one to your BFF.